Interview #1

Brittiny’s interview took place on Thursday, June 23, 2011.

Q: What is your name?

Brittiny Massey

Q: Where were you born?

Chicago, Illinois

Q: Where did you grow up?

Up until age16 I grew up in Chicago, then I relocated in Mississippi where I currently reside in Grenada, Mississippi.

Q: What were your parent’s names and occupations?

My mother’s name is Shirley Anne Massey and she is a school teacher and formally principal for a private school in Juliet, Illinois, and my father’s name is William Massey and he is a supervisor for housing authority in Chicago, Illinois as well as shift manager for Operational Manager here in Mississippi.

Q: Do you have any siblings? Yes or No, names?

I do, I have several siblings actually. Nina Massey and she is 29 and she’s my older sister and Derrick Massey and he’s my older brother, myself and then there’s my brother Martel. He’s a year younger than me. Martavious Massey and Courtney Massey is my youngest sister.

Q: What was your life like growing up as a black girl in Chicago?

Umm, growing up I would say I lived a pretty decent life. I will say I lived a middle class average life. I think what most people would say. There were struggles with my parents because there were so many of us, and there were so many children; there were a lot more responsibilities for my parents. So, they had to work sometimes harder or longer to support us all. 

Q: Did you ever encounter racism? Explain?

I did where I was located. I was always raised to help a person to see… people don’t judge people fairly off of what they are; we have so many stereotypes. One thing my parents help me to me to judge people off what you do or know. Not so much on what you may prefer or how you think or your personal preferences.

Q: What privileges or setbacks do you feel that you experienced growing up a black female in the North/South?

Umm I would honestly say in the North I would say that there is a little bit more discrimination as far as corporate and industrial area and corporate economics. Women, although they have opportunities especially in the North, you will see a lot stereotypical businessmen, and for the South it’s primarily the same thing. More so, I would say gender being the central focus, so then race at this point.

Q: What, if anything, do you remember your parents telling you about race?

One thing my grandmother people do not realize that is that she is mixed. Her mother was mixed and her father was white. My family has always been then type to express that diversity is important. It’s important because it gives you a better cultural perspective on things, and it enhances your ability to adapt to situations because you do have that level of cultural diversity.

Q: What do you remember your parents telling you about sex?

My mother and father. Well my father was a preacher first of all, so our household was: this is girls and this is guys. It wasn’t more so much that women were allotted to do it was more so his personal expectations or more so guys were expected to take out the garbage, where as women were expected to wash the dishes. He reinforced things like that but he never just pressured us about this is guys or this is girls. But generally I would say what I remember the most is my father was a very involved person. My father actually played sports with his girls. So you really didn’t have one way biases where girls would do one thing and guys would do another. He was really open-minded.

Q: What did your parents tell you or instill in you regarding being a woman, specifically a black woman?

That we are rare because a black woman. It’s your definition of how you define a woman, and a successful woman at that. As a black woman we have this double standard that we have to live to being black because of our ethnic background. And you know as well as because of our gender you do know we have to deal with that. But again she told me both of them instilled in me the way to eliminate those prejudices are to again show people through what you do. And so if they do judge you it’s off the things that they see that you have done and contributed to and not so much stereotypes or personal opinions.

Q: Did you attend school? Yes or No, why or why not?

Yes I do attend school, and I attend school because I feel like that it will help me as a person, because I want to help better myself, and I want to give myself opportunities, because without school I will not be able to attend to obtain. And school is not just wonderful for work but also for networking and just socially. It is good for you as far as career-wise so there is just so many open-ends to why I attend school, but primarily because I want to better myself.

Q: Talk a little bit about those days...

Because of that fact that I am so spontaneous, and that my interest tend to scatter and I just like to do different things, and with that is the way I am about things like that. I feel that that is important. You know to go to school to do the things I do, but I face some people, because of my gender or because of my race, I have literally time the first time I moved to Mississippi I was called the ‘N’ word, and I had never had that to happen before, and another situation where I’ve experienced both types of discrimination. For a job, where I was twice as qualified as well as my sister; she had a Master’s degree and she graduated at the age of 15 from high school, and she was a graduate of Ole Miss Cum Laude and there was a young man who had a Bachelor’s degree, and he received a job over her. And those are a few types of things that you face growing up and having to deal with and primarily you don’t let those be your focus. And you take those and let them be motivating factors.

Q: Did you get married?  To who?  When?  [Ask about the circumstances]

No I did not get married. I myself I, myself, I’m a lesbian woman with a life partner. If I was to get married, and I have not got married because I feel my focus right now is centered on my education, because I’m the type of person that believes that in order to contribute positively to someone else’s life, I have to have my own life together. And you know, I have to have my own ducks lined up, so to speak.

Q: Did you have any children? Yes or No? How many?  Why?  Was this a choice or just happened?  If no children, you could ask them why they chose not to or was it medical reasons.

I do not have any children. I want children one day. I do not see them in my shot-term future. Umm as I said, I am a person about structure and organization, and I’ve also had to raise and had to get temporary custody of my niece, who is now 4. So I know what that experience is like, and I know that personally dealing with school and everything else I could not handle the situation. So, at this point in my life, I hope to live comfortably for the child and for me, because I wouldn’t want the child to lack anything I couldn’t provide on a certain level.

Q: Where did they work as an adult

I worked at Grenada Lake Medical Center for two years. I was an Accounts Payable System Accountant. That’s just where you basically pay the bills, but my boss, it was so many different things that weighed on that job. There were a lot of things that played as a factor, because the youngest person that worked there besides me was thirty five years old. So that alone left this big uncomfortable feeling. So it left a feeling of uncomfortable for me, because everyone else was so much older, and you know everyone else beside myself, was of African American descent in the office that we worked in. And she had been there previously 10 years herself, so she had been there awhile for them to be used to. It was kinda weird at first. I don’t know if they thought I could handle the job, or you know personal stereotypes. I don’t know what it was but for a while I didn’t have anyone to speak to me for the first two weeks. It was really quiet, but I guess after my work performance, it spoke for itself and what they had thought about me. But my boss (sigh) I don’t want to say he was sexist, but he had a very very bad problem about categorizing things like and women in one category and men in another category – like they were separate, and they could never be holistically counted for together. And he would just do certain things. And certain jobs he felt like men were more sufficient at handling and certain jobs he felt like women and he would say little jokes and things like that. And you know that they weren’t meant to be really offense, but if you didn’t know him, you probably would think he was. But just things like that. I never really had to deal with any hostile employees or coworkers. 

Q: What was like living as an openly gay black woman?

Ha ha ha. Living as an openly gay black woman. Whether it was up north or here in Mississippi, it’s a task in itself. Umm I’ve just never really had someone to approach me on the situation, but looks of disapproval and you know, small talk, or you know sometimes, like I said, I understand that we have people who have stereotypes about people and again all of those fall behind: I’m a woman, I’m black, I’m a lesbian. So for me, sometimes I feel like I have to prove myself to people. I’ll change that. And sometimes I feel like I don’t have to prove myself I feel like sometimes other people sometimes I can’t do the job or I can’t do certain things, because of those factors. And so I push to show that those factors actually don’t even matter. And they have no dictation of my work ethic, what I believe, and how I lead my life.

Q:  What were their relationships like with other women?  Specifically ask about white and black women.

It’s so funny. Up until about 16 or 17 years old, primarily women in my life were white women. And then, as I got older that changed. That shift came. And it was the other way- black women. So, I have a perspective on how women in general just live their lives. And how they do. Women that I interact with, I love them. They understand that my sexuality holds you know nothing of who I am as a person, or like I said my work performance and anything like that. Just the women that I interact with on a daily basis are understanding, caring, they just respect me. And that’s something many people don’t get especially people are of a minority and ethnic background and who chose to live a non social norm life. Whether heterosexual or homosexual lifestyle goes. 

Q: Would they consider themselves friends with white women?  Or do they have friends that are of another race?

I do. I do. I have one friend that is my best friend. And she is white. Her name is Christine. We grew up together and she lives in Canada now. And she’s having her second child now, and those are my god children. I don’t see a color barrier. That one thing I’m blessed that my parents did give me. They never made see a barrier for physical characteristics. I never held anyone to anything like that. It was always what a person does. You should be known for what you do and what you contribute to your environment and surroundings. Not stereotypes that people may hold to you. 

Q: What type of relationship do you have with black men?

Umm black men are my best friends. (laughter) They are my best friends. The majority of my friends are males, and they are black males. Umm, I find it easy to talk to them. Believe it or not especially males, I do not find conversations to get across, but they find comfort in me, because they feel like they have that female aspect at the same they don’t have to worry so much about the same emotions they feel. Playing the same role. So, black men I would say are important to our society. My relation with them are that of a brother.

Q:  What do you think is the role of both black men and women in relationships and inside of the home should be? [Here, you can ask specific questions regarding marriage and the roles of both men and women inside of marriage]

I think all relationships are similar. I think that there has to be a certain level of balance with the sense of what’s going on around. And taking care of the task because if you don’t feel like that support that backbone support and sometimes not are you the backbone and support but you are the foundation of that person. So I feel that, no matter heterosexual or homosexual I feel like every couple is different, and every circumstance is different. So I think that the situation has a lot to play on that. I don’t feel that there are certain roles, certain relationships, that should be played. Because I have so many guy friends who are cooks who cook for their moms and their wives every night, and they enjoy it. And that’s what they do. And likewise. I know that I have friends who are lawyers or social workers, or truck drivers who are female and they love what they do. I think as a couple your role to the other person is to be that support system that the other person needs. And to take care of your business, because if you are doing things, the way they should be done, there’s less likely a chance for problems to come up, and if you don’t look at it as a role type of situation, as oppose to a problem we need to take care of holistically together.

Q:  What do you think about people dating outside of their race?  Black men marrying white women and black women marrying white men?

I think it is beautiful. I think it is great, because I think that diversity is needed. I think sometimes we can’t figure out why we can’t address certain situations because, but our own narrow mindedness it is really what holds us all back. It limits us because we don’t take the time, to you know learn, to read up on things. We like to go off what have said because we have heard it. It’s a lot of times it holds no clout. It holds no credibility, but it’s things we have heard for so long.  Things we have accepted socially. I think it’s a time for change for that. I think it’s time for people to be held accountable for how they do things. And you know I think that’s something that is important and could contribute to all of our lives. 

Q:  What issues do you think most affect black Americans today?

Literacy, financial problems, and I would just say motivation, because it’s sad, because there is a stereotype if you want to get anything passed black people put it on paper or put it in writing. Cause we’ve led so much to acquiring knowledge through our TV. And through the Internet more so than through books. We’re more so on memory than learning and I think that is hindering us a race for pushing forward, because we don’t look at things like that. Education – people fought for that, people cried for that, and sat through demonstration so we could have the opportunity and people are so relax that they are we don’t even appreciate other things that people have gone through to get to get to this point. So we ourselves could have the opportunity to learn and to grow and to develop the social skills we need. The academic skills we need. Just the life skills we need.

Thank you so much, Brittiny!